A Note From A Rebel: A Healthy Relationship Rule That Even *I* Follow

relationships Oct 16, 2018

All relationships take work.  Some more than others.

So, if you’re putting in the work build healthy relationships (more on that in my past post here) and using positive reinforcement to sustain the goodness (past post on that here), then it’s time to spit and shake hands on it.  It’s time to ensure both of your needs are clear and heard by making agreements.

“Rules” Confine, “Agreements” Build Trust

I fell on the word “agreements” years ago given that I have problems with authority.  I don’t care to be pressured, as I’m sure you don’t either.  I start to itch and a bead of sweat rolls down my back.  I’ve never been one for rules just for rules sake, but I do understand a certain order is needed to control all the humanness floating around out there.  Through my years of coaching I have worked with pairs and groups of people and evolved from asking them to agree on...

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How Positive Reinforcement will Improve Toxic Relationships

Toxic relationships suck.  In last week’s blog, I discussed 3 Effective Ways To Turn Relationships From Sour To Sweet and shared that addressing it was the first step.  Now to sustain it we need to use positive reinforcement to point out the progress!

Like Begets Like (positive = more positive)

A few years ago I was coaching two Executives that weren’t hearing or seeing each other as well as anyone would have liked.  After numerous coaching sessions 1:1 with me and the three of us together, we were at a place to try practicing what we had discussed.  Calling out the positive shifts was a key part of the process, as it honored the work and progress that each of them had made.  It accelerated their progress tremendously and can do the same for you!

It may seem hard at first, complimenting the person who is causing you frustration or pain.  However, the old adage “kill them with kindness” does have merit.  It...

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3 Effective Ways to Take Relationships from Sour to Sweet

leadership relationships Oct 01, 2018

We can agree that having good working relationships is ideal.  But working with other humans can be HARD. With a little intention and positivity, it gets a whole lot easier.  The first step is the most important – addressing it.  I’ll share three options you have, which can even build on each other, in today’s post.  

Don’t Suffer In Silence

I can hear you now…”I’ve tried to make it work with them, but they’re impossible!”  I’ve been there. There are certain people out there that you may never fully click with.  There are many strategies that can make all the difference. In fact, my last blog series tackled six strategies to improve relationships.  

In my experience, to make lasting, impactful change we can’t assume that the other person is feeling the same frustration.  Like it or not, addressing it is critical to moving forward. Don’t worry, depending on your...

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Seal the Deal in Relationships

leadership relationships Jun 20, 2018

My post on 4/3 tackled getting into alignment at work and it was a doozie!  Many of you had requests to go a bit deeper into the content, so we’ve covered five of the “7 Ways To Get Alignment At Work” (and in life!).  This post is an expansion of the last two tips:  #6, Make New Agreements and #7, Set Check-Ins.

We’ve expanded each tip in the last 5 posts:

  1. Take Ownership: Bring Down the Judgement and Up The Curiosity To Improve Relationships
  2. Know your own talents. Stop Acting Like You Aren’t Awesome. Own it, Invest and Dominate.
  3. Consider What You Want. P.A.D. Yourself to Get Clear On What You Want
  4. Speak Up. Speak Your Truth: To Others, But First Yourself
  5. Ask questions and listen. How To Engage Others To Move An Issue Forward, Without Ticking Them Off

Now we move on to #6 Making Agreements and #7 Setting Check-ins.

Shake Hands On It

Maybe literally, but at least figuratively.  If you...

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Bring Down the Judgement and Up the Curiosity to Improve Relationships

Last week’s post tackled getting into alignment at work and it was a doozie!  Many of you had requests to go a bit deeper into the content, so I will break it in pieces and share a bit more about each of the “7 Ways To Get Alignment At Work” (and in life!).  This is an expansion of tip #1: Take Ownership.

Judgey McJudgerton

We’re all biased.  We all judge.  And those things affect the way we see the world, our work and other people.  

I recently was talking with a friend who shared an interesting realization.  She had been doing some reflection on her “learned beliefs,” those beliefs we are exposed to growing up through our home life, activities, people we meet, etc.  One of her a-ha’s is that her whole life she felt animosity and a sort of anger towards people with big families.  It was only when she looked back into her learned beliefs that she was reminded of negative comments about large families...

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